I have what I like to call Small Business Guilt. It means that I have a really, really hard time taking time off. An hour here or there I can do, a healthy 5 hours of sleep a night, I can do. Going to the movies, or the grocery store, sometimes but I still get anxious. Now, taking a full on vacation, that makes my chest feel like it is going to cave in. But, since our summer is completely and totally shot, it's now or never for us to take 4 days off work. We're going to Frisco, North Carolina to sleep with ponies on the beach with some of Doug's very best friends and their families.
I haven't always been like this. Before I owned my own business, I took time off all the time. Probably too much, because let's be real here, I hate working 9-5, or in my case it was 4am-2pm. I hate clocking in, and feeling like my whole day is blown because I have to work late or whatever. I didn't care about requesting a week off for a road trip, or a stay-cation in my house eating pizza, sleeping in and reading on the porch until my eyes hurt. I guess because it was always just "a job" but now it's more than that. We love what we do, and it's really difficult to take time off. BUT, we just finished up a pretty hefty wholesale order for our Japanese distributor that will be on its way tomorrow, and for the most part are caught up on orders in our Etsy shop. I have about 15 more sunglasses to ship out on Friday, and then there is no turning back. I have three bathing suits I plan on living in, blog posts scheduled, a dog/house sitter who hilariously responded to my inquiry about what food I can buy her, that she only eats "lobster, caviar and smart water," a new camera, my watercolors and these four books I plan on starting and finishing during our trip.
Do you feel small biz owners guilt for taking time off? How do you counter it? Any tips on battling the guilt?
I picked up all of these used, but I will leave links to each book, in case you want to join along in my reading adventure and also forego responsibility for a few days. The first book I got is The Way the Crow Flies by Anne Marie MacDonald. I love books told from a kids perspective, and books set in the 50s, 60s or 70s. That time frame seems to be kind of magical. This book has both, so I'm sure I'll love it.
The next is The Sailor Who Fell from Grace with the Sea by Yukio Mishima. A band of savage thirteen year old boys in post world war 2 Japan. That's all I have to say to know it's good.
The next is a collection of short stories. I am pretty on the fence when it comes to shorts, because they are either really good, or really terrible, and I can't say I like them more when they're good because then they end. I, like most of the world, hates when a good thing ends. The Vintage Book of Contemporary Short stories seems like a really pretentious title, but I'm going with it because I like the cover. Also, I may have already read this, we'll soon find out.
I do that often, by the way. Read a book I have already read, and sometimes I don't remember I've read it until the end. I told you, my brain is fried. Damn you, early twenties. And lastly, Little Bee by Chris Cleave. I guess after reading more reviews, it's slightly political, which I didn't get from the back sleeve or the cover. I am going to be open to it, and see where it goes, but it seems mysterious and the reviews call it brutal. Yikes!
I have a mountain of a to-do list but I feel achy and stressed, so I thought I would sit and share my beach books with you. Have you read any good books lately? I'd love to know!