I have recently acquired a collection of bone china miniature animals and am so excited to find them all new homes. Sometimes I think of myself as an adoption agency. I collect the inanimate animals and you can adopt them! Give them a good home, feed them dust bunnies, you know, that kind of thing. Bone china miniatures are one of my favorites. I like wooden miniatures, and even the early plastic ones, but bone china is like holding a ice sculpture, or moth wings, in your hands. Fragile and beautiful.
They make me smile and I'm not sure yet if I can let them go...I need more things to make me smile today.
I am unfortunately trying to distract myself from some sadness in my family life right now. I have been so lucky in my 26 years, to have all four of my grandparents in my life, and a healthy family, but after a very long conversation with my Dad this afternoon, that may not be the case for very much longer. To say I am homesick, confused and overwhelmed with pre-grief is just to say the least. Cherish your families. Hug them a lot, and if you're too far away, a phone call is easy as pie. I know that I won't have my grandparents forever, but they are so important to me and the thought of them not being a phone call away is heart wrenching.
The fact that my grandfather, which you probably already know has Alzheimer's, has lived to 90 (on Tuesday, October 4th, he will turn 90 years old,) is a blessing. I still talk to him once a week, although he no longer knows who I am, and I can't be thankful enough for the last 26 years and however long we still have. Nobody knows that, so I won't pretend to.
I'm going to try to get back to work. Life isn't easy. Crying is good. I can't wait to hug Doug extra hard when he gets home.